Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize