If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Randomize
