i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize