Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
