omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
