okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
