He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Randomize
