her vagine was all disorganized.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
