from now on my penis is your penis
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i died would you start the facebook group?
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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