i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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