Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
