Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Randomize
