They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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