He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
