how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Rumble strips road head = magical
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
