i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
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