she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize