Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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