her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This baby is an asshole
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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