so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Randomize
