He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
please don't ironically join a cult
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