The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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