Pregnant stripper...not hot.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
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