i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I think a kid would responsible me up
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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