You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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