Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
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