Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
