I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize