another moral hangover. fuck.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
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his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
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At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
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