I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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