I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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