Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
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