Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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