We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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