Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Randomize