Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
