when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Drake has all the answers
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
