in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
