problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
When are your genitals available?
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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