Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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