? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I want to fling myself into the sun
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