There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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