Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Randomize
