She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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