Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
