Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
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