You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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