If i come over, it means nothing
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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