I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
