i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
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ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
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And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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